My Story: Megan Gordon

Often I think that there isn’t a lot to my testimony, that God hasn’t rescued me from a past of drug addiction or sexual immorality… but then I realise He has! He has protected me from going down that path. His goodness is written all over my life!

My parents are from Donegal, and I was born there in Letterkenny in December 1984. They were both brought up in Catholic homes. My Mam actually made a decision to follow Jesus when she was eighteen, and walked in a close relationship with Him for three years. But for different reasons she didn’t continue in that relationship. Sometime later she met my dad, and thus followed me and my sister, Naomi. My parents decided to bring us up uncommitted to any one faith as they wanted us to choose for ourselves.

All throughout my childhood, as kids do, I would ask my parents what they believed in. at different points in my childhood I remember my Mam telling me of the time she had followed Jesus. I was told this story a lot as a child. I recall asking her many times, “how do you become a Christian“, and she would always say “just ask Jesus into your heart”. I prayed this at many different times over the years, just to see if something would happen! I never experienced anything at the time, but I know now, that through those prayers God was moving my heart toward Him.

Growing up in a Catholic country and attending a Catholic primary and secondary school was interesting. In primary school I didn’t participate in any of the religion classes because my parents didn’t want me committed to any one faith, this was quite isolating at times. I envied the other kids, especially during the communion and confirmation seasons where I didn’t get to take part in those celebrations. My mam was so thoughtful though, and made sure to give my sister and me a special treat and dress-up day for those occasions.

At age sixteen I entered my fourth year of school. This is called transition year/work experience in the school I attended. There wasn’t much to do that year, and to be honest it is pretty typical for teens to “mitch” school (skip school) in fourth year. My friends and I did a lot of  mitching. Internally I was doing a lot of questioning about God and my beliefs. One day, due to the pain of her grandfather’s death, my friend said to me, “I wish I was like you, and didn’t believe in God “. That really struck me. I had never made a decision to believe or not to believe, and I actually wished I did believe in God! Now more than ever I was determined to find out about God.

It just so happened that my friends and I had started hanging out in An Tobar Nua early that school year. We got to know the workers, three Americans and one Irish guy, pretty well. Over the months they each shared their own stories with us:  their pasts and the struggles Jesus rescued them from, and the deep friendship they now had with Christ. I saw joy, peace, and love in their lives that I had never seen so clearly in anybody before. They explained that we could know Jesus in a real and personal way. I wanted this in my life and I accepted Jesus into my heart that December. My heart was filled with love like I had never felt before. It sounds corny, but I was completely overwhelmed with love for people.

To walk with God is an adventure.

It was all really exciting! Three other friends asked Jesus into their lives around that time, too. Walking with God was an amazing adventure for each of us. I prayed and read my Bible everyday, eager to discover what God was going to say to me through the Scripture. We were all growing in our faith so much. We shared Bible verses with each other, and prayed for one another. God blessed our friendships and gave us the gift of each other to keep us strong in our faith.

Unfortunately things didn’t remain that way. One by one my friends decided they didn’t want to walk with God anymore. I found out quickly that being a Christian is a daily choice. I fall. I make mistakes. I get discouraged. I’m human. It’s tempting to want to give up. Entering my fifth year of school that year was hard. The support God had given me in my friends wasn’t there anymore. I felt alone, but God was truly with me and I pressed on. I also felt God calling me into deeper relationship with Him, saying, “Are you going to stick with Me regardless of who is walking beside you? I am with you, is that enough? Do you still choose Me, even though it’s hard?” It was hard and I got discouraged at times. He reminded me of the people He had given me in An Tobar Nua and drew me to the cafe again and again, for support, friendship and encouragement.

As I entered my leaving cert year, I began to seek God as to what He wanted me to do the following year. To work in An Tobar Nua was HEAVY on my heart and every night I prayed, “God, please, if this isn’t of  You, just drop it from my mind”. Honestly, it wasn’t something that I really wanted to do at all, but month after month that thought remained strong on my heart. Finally I gave in and decided to do something about this. I approached Kelly, An Tobar Nua’s founder, and asked him to pray about me coming to work there the next year.

In 2004, I started my first year working in An Tobar Nua and now I have just started my fifth year. God has taught me so much here. He has pushed me out of my comfort zone in many areas, from giving purity talks to groups of sixty-plus leaving cert students, to taking on challenges I wouldn’t have thought possible. He has shown me that He is the One who equips me to do all things He calls me to.

To walk with God is an adventure. He has a plan for my life. He is good. He is faithful. His love NEVER fails. Although I fail and mess up, He is far bigger than my failures. He continues to call me closer to Him. I’m so thankful to get to share Jesus with the people He sends into An Tobar Nua.